You Will Make Disciples This Year
“I’ve never thought of it that way” was his answer.
I was sitting with a father of three discussing the impact dads have on their children. Our conversation began with the success he was having in business. He told me how good things were going with his business and the growth he experienced in 2017.
His business increase over 40% from previous year’s quota. That is a big accomplishment and something to celebrate! His company loved what he did so much they gave him the award, “Rep of the Year”, put him on the Presidents Club, and gave him a trip to the Bahamas. That’s on top of the incredible amount of money he made.
As we celebrated he got a call, it was his wife. She told him of an issue she was having with their oldest son. They talked for a few minutes and he said he would talk with him when he got home that evening.
Way Too Busy
I took that moment to inquire about his son. He told me a little, nothing crazy, but enough to cause frustrations in the home. I asked him how much time he spent with his son. He gave the same excuse I had heard a thousand times. “We are just crazy busy”, and he was right.
Kids, business and life, church, small groups etc. sneak up and we find ourselves way in over our heads.
He ended up answering my question about how much time he spent with his son by saying, “Not enough for sure. We used to spend a lot of time together. In fact, I told myself that I wasn’t going to be that dad who didn’t hang out with his kids. I was determined to be very intentional with my kids.”
But Life…You can probably feel his pain.
As a Christ follower, we are commanded in Matthew 28:19-20 to make disciples. That’s not a suggestion. If you are married with kids that process starts there in the home. That is your first small group, and your first place to lead spiritually. Yet often that gets pushed to the side and taken for granted. We say it’s important to impact our kids but when we peel the layers back and take a real look we see that we are not as intentional as we want to be.
One Way or Another
You will make disciples. One way or another, you will. The definition of a disciple is “follower/learner”. If you are in management you disciple those you lead in whatever business practices you are in to help the company perform its best. If you are owner of a company, your employees are your disciples. If you have kids, they are your disciples. The question you must ask yourself is, “what kind of disciples will I make?” Especially among those who live under your roof.
Several months ago, I was speaking to a large medical company with close to 600 reps and managers. The owner of the company had me come in to talk about “managing career and family”. You could hear a pin drop over the 45-minute talk I gave - what I was saying hit a nerve.
I shared with them my experience and ensured they heard this line, “Don’t sacrifice your personal and family life at the expense of the business, both will lose.”
After my presentation, there was a line of men and women wanting to talk and to set up meetings with me to help them be more effective in their personal worlds. One of the men I spoke with told me that he gets in the shower before work every morning and says to himself, “I need to be a better husband and dad, but I never seem to get around to it.” He said he didn’t know his kids and his marriage was just so-so.
…never get around to it.
Have you ever felt that way? I have. In fact, I had to make some serious changes in my own life to make sure I didn’t lose, in some way, the greatest gifts I’ve ever been given - my family. I ended up hiring a coach to help me process my life so that I could win on both in my business practices and at home.
Do you know what you model to your kids will often be what they do as well?
Unless they make some intentional choices to make changes then they will be just like you. Now, that could be really good if are intentional in helping shape them into the man/woman they need to be. But, if you choose to be the parent that just wings it then your impact for the good will be minimal at best.
Here are 4 things you can do to be intentional as a man who makes disciples at home:
Embrace the Command
The imperative command in Matthew 28:19-20 is to “make disciples” not “go” as most pastors teach. But until you embrace the command as your own you will not do it. You must take personal responsibility to be intentional and make your kids your main target to disciple, to train up and then to one day release.
Get a Coach
We spend money on the things that are valuable to us. It may cost money to change, but it’s worth it. Get a coach. This is one of the things we do within Sharpening Ministries. We coach men and women to be effective as a follower of Christ and in their specific roles.
My point: find someone to help you.
Make a Plan
Stay the course. Stick to it. You make business plans each year so that you can grow your business. Do the same for your family so that you will build them up to be who God intended them to be.
Re-teach Another
Look for opportunities to help someone else be effective in making disciples of their kids. Like I said you will make a disciple one way or another. We all know that when we study and re-teach others we get better and more effective. You will be killing two birds with one stone. You and the ones you re-teach.
Like I said you will make disciples this year one way or another. This is a good time to consider what kind of disciples you will make. Within Sharpening Ministries we teach that “My compromise today will set the next generation's standard.”
The way you lead, teach and model is what the ones coming behind you will believe that is the way it’s supposed to be. So, what will they learn from you?
